From Kenny: Here’s yet another post from guest blogger Tim Price. Check out some of his other posts here.
I once got a tattoo on my arm. It is a wooden cross with a banner wrapped around it. The banner says “Music” and “Life.” When I got it I was a new Christian and didn’t really know why I got it, I just drew it once and it looked cool. Over time it has taken on new meaning.
The very last night I ever abused substances like drugs and alcohol I said something to myself that at the time I thought was very profound…
“You can take anything from me, but you can’t take away my songs.”
I had a lot of strange philosophies about music and life. For one, I thought they were both mine. I thought of all the things I owned, you couldn’t take my songs away because they sort of existed in a strange vein of reality, that is music. It’s not necessarily something you can just take out of my hand.
Secondly I believed so strongly that music itself could give me life. I thought music could give me life when in fact it was eating me alive, because it was a major idol in my life. It really did consume me, and I wasn’t even that good at it! Literally a few minutes after I recognized that my entire life came crumbling down and I begged God to have my life.
That was the day before my sobriety birthday.
This tattoo symbolizes for me now a sort of sacrifice of music and my life. I still enjoy both thoroughly! I haven’t become a gnostic and rejected all fleshy things or anything like that. I believe that in my sacrifice of these things I have come to love them both a greater capacity than I ever could have before.
I used to think I was great because I really appreciated nature. I would look at the sky in awe and it would sometimes get me through the day. But I never went beyond that in my thinking. Who gave me the sky? Who gave me the eyes to appreciate it?
I’ve never enjoyed life so much now that I know it doesn’t belong to me. Now that I know it’s his and that he created it all, I can look beyond these incredible created things to the Creator Himself and enjoy them as the gifts that they are.
We don’t have to rely on things that die to give us life. It’s all His and He is the source of it all.